from bottom to infinity(zero Ohms)

Depression/hitting the bottom can be a catalyst for change.
There have been times where losing all will in life, dying inside have sparked a sense of freedom....of coming back from the dead. Not that I wanted to feel this way, but life's details with the combination of tradition teaching me to weigh my self-worth and how to define myself based on success/failures/loss/etc. caused me to lose all will. We're taught to compare our lives with the current standard of society....which changes with each generation. So, tradition is not absolute. It is relative, inconsistent, and dependent....and ever changing.

Once the perpetual creation of the presence of the self starts back up it tricks the mind into playing the game again. Its still a part of nature. The "Traditional Kernel" has been developed like open source software down through the ages.....down to our parents and down to us. It includes thought patterns, instincts, and the other biological/physiological coding. These "drivers" and "operating systems" are what we've got to work with. Might as well try to accept that we have to think. The only trick is to find out and troubleshoot the "mis-step" and find the "bugs" in the software without taking it personal....because what's taking it personal is the software itself.

The mind's projection of the ego/self image, is absolutely a part of nature....almost like the social mindsets of animals that pack together in groups in order to be more efficient and successful in surviving as a whole species. We use the ego as an ID in society, but we've also figured out a way to dangle carrots in our minds....and when we get something....we reward ourselves in our minds/releasing pleasure chemicals. With our imaginations, we've went beyond simple survival.....and created meaning to motivate ourselves. Somewhere a momentum started to find, to create meaning.......as if there's no meaning already without our creation of it. Maybe the fact that anything exists....maybe everything already has its own absolute value and meaning...that we'll never know what it is. For something to be known, it has to be memory....is the self memory? Am "I" memory? To see "absolute meaning" as it is in the present would be something huh? That's what the sages all point to anyway....the present moment.

There are times as a human being, resentment can build toward the way things are in the world. I remember a while back, I looked at a picture of some planet in another galaxy. It struck me that if life ever evolved to create beings such as ourselves on that planet, they'd use "thought" and deduction and measurement and comparison, just like we do. It's a part of the package deal in existence.....its a part of nature that "we know not what we do."

It's not always easy to see that, to feel it all the time.........or even share this with people. I'm just taking a chance and throwing all this out there, in hopes someone can use it.

In electricity
Zero Ohms(resistance)= Infinite Amps(current/flow)
When I saw this in class, it was amazing at how it fit right in with philosophy. (especially Taoism)

My insomnia kept me up late, so I'll leave it here and try to get some sleep. Nite all.